Healthy Thoughts – New Poem (1st Draft)

Healthy Thoughts

My therapist says it’s healthy

that after the death of my Granddad

I’m not thinking about my own demise.

It’s healthy, apparently, and very positive


that I’m wondering and worrying about

other, older people, people close to me

who fed me when I couldn’t speak,

picked me up when I feel over my own feet,

crossed my palm with five pound notes,

and closed my fingers over, with their own.


People who have squeezed their lives

for all their worth, and gone in the direction

where their hearts have led them.


My dreams are heavy with death and dying,

and guilt wants to find its way

back into the cave of my thoughts.


But there is an escape route,  through the rocks

above my head, and sunlight is bouncing

off the silvery puddles gathered around my feet.